Aashiyan

This was the fourth time in a week that he’d woken up with a smile on his face. He shook his head and groaned, turning and burying his head in his pillow. Pathetic. But then, no one could blame him. He was happy, wasn’t he? More than, he realized, he’d ever been. He snorted, Turning around and folding his arms under his head. What was he, a fucking girl, now? Speaking of…

He looked at the neatly made part of his bed, and wondered where his girl was. God, he hoped she hadn’t gone to work. It was the Sunday before their launch, and Khushi was being maniacal in how she was working them. This was supposed to be their day off. He pulled himself up and out of bed, intent on dressing up and going to the office so that he could drag her obsessed ass back home to relax, when he heard it. It was some Hindi song, he was pretty sure he’d heard it before. The music was a bit quirky and he remembered liking it because of that. Hmmm…

He followed the song to the kitchen, Bare-chested and bare foot, wearing only a pair of sweatpants, and paused in the door at the beautiful scene in front of him. 

Itti si hansi
Itti si khushi
Itta sa tukda chand ka
Khwabon ke tinkon se
Chal banayeinn aashiyaan

Dabe dabe paaon se
Aaye haule haule zindagi
Hothon pe kundi chadha ke
Hum taale laga ke chal
Gumsum tarane chupke chupke gaayein
Aadhi aadhi baant le
Aaja dil ki ye zameen
Thoda sa tera sa hoga
Thoda mera bhi hoga apna ye aashiyan

He smiled, leaning against the doorjamb as he took it in. The oh-so familiar scene, and realized that he had missed this. The song was playing on the radio that they kept on the fridge (“Because Arnav, the food will taste better if I’m happy while I’m making it! And listening to music makes me Happy!”) And his Khush, clad in an oversized red tee of his and white shorts, flitted around busily. Cooking. Home, he decided. This, for him, was home. Not the expensive Hotel rooms they stayed in; nor the fancy apartments their realtor had insisted on showing them… this. Him and Khushi. Together.  

He settled back, relaxing against the jamb as he watched her roll and knead the dough with all her might. He’d always loved watching her cook. It had rhythm, and it had somehow always grounded him… gave him a sense of calm and peace. The strangest thing… but there it was. She was making aloo parathe, from the looks of it. Arnav’s favourite. He loved Khushi’s stuffed aloo parathe. Her stuffing was always perfect, and he could swear no one, absolutely no one, could ever match what she made. It was the perfect amount of spicy and soft with a tinge of some bitter-sweet thing, and the best part? She was always generous with the butter on the parathe. He grinned. He hadn’t had Khush’s parathe in such a long time! 

She started rolling out the parathe, and he realized that her movements were perfectly in sync with the song playing. He tuned in, and realized why he’d remembered this song so well…

Naa ho chaar deewarein
Phir bhi jharokhe khule
Baadalon ke ho parde
Shaakhi hari pankha jhale
Naa ho koi takraarein
Are masti thahaake chale
Pyaar ke sikkon se mahine ka kharcha chale

Dabe dabe paaon se
Aaye haule haule zindagi
Hothon pe kundi chadha ke
Hum taale laga ke chal
Gumsum tarane chupke chupke gaayein
Aadhi aadhi baant le
Aaja dil ki ye zameen
Thoda sa tera sa hoga
Thoda mera bhi hoga apna ye Aashiyan

It reminded him of them. He laughed under his breath, shaking his head as he thought about it. It was- as they said- their song. It was about two people, being each other’s world. The deaf and dumb boy and the autistic girl. Making a home together. He smiled, ring a bell much, Raizada?

There they’d been. Him and his Khush. Alone in the big bad world. He shook his head, what had possessed him that night, to ferry a barely thirteen year old girl with him to a place like Delhi? Hell, he’d been seventeen himself, or had it been eighteen? And with no money too! And what had she been thinking? Trusting him like that? He could have led them to their deaths, for all she knew! But she had trusted him, and they’d made it to Delhi. Living in a small chawl room; hand to mouth for the first two months. But his Khush had been a good Manager even then. She had been saving up, and in no time, they had been living a bit more comfortably… at least they hadn’t needed to pinch so much money. He hadn’t had to worry about feeding them continuously. He realized he wouldn’t have survived a day if he hadn’t had that spunky teenager to look after him at that time.

And then, she’d started this tradition of theirs. The one of celebrating every holiday. Diwali, Eid, Christmas, Navratri… he remembered she had even bullied him into celebrating Gandhi Jayanti once.

She would make something delicious, and they would gift each other something over dinner. He remembered the metal earrings he’d gotten her one Diwali, he’d gone through each and every stall in Sarojini Nagar Market, and when he’d found what he’d been looking for he’d bargained for hours. He smiled… it had been worth it though. The way her eyes had always lit up every time he’d gifted her something. As if he’d laid the world at her feet. Every time. Whether it was earrings, shoes, once he’d brought a Filmfare Magazine home, even then she’d thrown herself in his arms with a delighted laugh and read through that copy for months, smiling at the same news, gossip and photos over and over again. And she would get him things too. Small things… she had gotten him his first tie. He still had it. Had to remember where you came from didn’t you? He hadn’t realized she had been slowly assembling a suit for him, one celebration at a time until he’d gotten a hand stitched blazer and she had squealed- “Wear it with all the others na, Arnav! And we can see how the suit looks on you!”

He thought about the empire they’d built together, and could hardly believe it himself. Who would, really? Unless they’d gone through it themselves, and seen- lived- the blood and sweat that had gone into it? Hers as much as His. But they’d made it, hadn’t they?

Itti si hansi
Itti si khushi
Itta sa tukda chand ka
Khwabon ke tinkon se
Chal banayeinn Aashiyan

He smiled, as he walked over to her and planted a kiss good morning on her bare shoulder.

One hand gripping her hip, as the other sneaked to the hot parathe on the plate. He laughed as she smacked his hand, already anticipating his move, and shook her head.

“Go freshen up, will you Arnav? I’ll have the breakfast on the table in five and then we can eat it like civilized people.”  

Bossy as ever. He smiled as he kissed her temple, and backed away. But there she was. His World. He inhaled sharply, as it hit him like a ton of bricks right in the middle of his chest. She was his world, always had been and always would be.

Man, this song was so going in his playlist!

NB: Aashiyan from Barfi! by Shreya Ghoshal

Catch Me

Before I fall, too fast
Kiss me quick, but make it last
So I can see how badly this will hurt me
When you say goodbye

Keep it sweet, keep it slow
Let the future pass, and don't let go
But tonight I could fall too soon
Into this beautiful moonlight

She smiled as she watched his serene face- her eyes eagerly tracing his features, softened by sleep. Her hands were trapped between them, even as he curled around her like some giant blankie- with one of his legs thrown over both of hers, one arm around her waist the other cradling her head; Keeping her completely surrounded by him.  

She tipped her head back and gently nudged his nose with hers, smothering a delighted laugh as he wriggled his nose, even as he drew her closer. Her Arnav. Her lips smiled against the slightly scratchy skin of his jaw, her hands turning so her palm lay against his heart. She took him in- this Man that was her life… that had been her life for as long as she could remember.

He had surprised her tonight. They had been running themselves and their team ragged as the Mumbai Royale launch drew nearer… her more so than him, with the added stress of Naivedyam and the inevitable end of their “relationship” weighing heavy on her mind. She had not paid much attention when, instead of insisting she stop working and come home with him, Arnav had informed her that he had to leave early today and requested her to not work herself into a coma. She’d only looked up and nodded her head once; going back to her laptop even as he’d kissed her temple and walked out.  

It had been nearly 10.30 pm when Aman had come in and refused to let her work anymore. She’d sighed, looked over some details once again and finally agreed to closing shop for the day. Khushi still hadn’t suspected anything when Aman offered to drive her home- a small smile playing around his lips, as he discreetly pressed a finger against the Bluetooth device in his ear. 

And then she’d walked in to what had supposed to be their Mumbai apartment- and she’d stood just inside the door, dumbstruck. Their living room had been cleared off all couches and sofas- with a single table with two chairs, standing in the middle of it. A single rose in a small ceramic vase standing on the beautifully laid table, the candles lining it the only source of light. Low music thrummed through the room, through her- and she felt herself relaxing. Her face stretched into a smile, as she looked around again.

A laugh had rolled through her as she spotted the pizza boxes sitting in the middle of the circle of candles, the LCD Television paused on a scene from her favorite animated movie. Tangled. Rapunzel was dancing along with the birds and butterflies as Flynn watched her. 

Then she had looked at the door leading off from the Room and spotted him. Her Flynn Rider. She’d giggled even as the thought had crossed her mind. He did look a little like Rapunzel’s rogue Prince Charming didn’t he? He’d smiled back at her, his eyes twinkling as though he knew what she was thinking- and agreed with her.

“Hey Khush.” 

How those two words alone, spoken in that husky intimate voice, could drain all tension from  her even as they made her nerve endings sizzle with very different kind of tension, was beyond her. He was wearing faded blue jeans and a simple black button down shirt, kept open at the throat, with the sleeves folded up to his elbows. His dark hair was wet, flopping into his eyes and he’d skipped shaving, the five ’o clock shadow making him look entirely yummy. 

See this heart won't settle down
Like a child running scared from a clown
I'm terrified of what you do
My stomach screams just when I look at you

“Arnav…?” The question in her voice made him smile even more, and she wasn’t sure but the sigh that left her seemed to be drawn all the way from her toes.  He tilted his head towards the TV and said, “I thought we could forget the tension tonight and just enjoy ourselves, what do you say?” And his eyes had twinkled even more as he watched her laugh. She’d nodded and then had come an evening, she was sure she would not forget till her dying breath. 

They’d watched the animated film, gorging on cheese filled pizzas (She loved the cheese burst ones, and he knew that very well), as she sat between his thighs laughing and teasing each other. Then, they’d moved to the table and he’d fed her ice cream, chocolate chip ice cream. She’d watched his eyes get darker and darker with every lick of her tongue against the spoon he held to her lips. She’d teased him about the elaborate date he’d planned- the candles, the rose… and the pizza and ice cream, and he’d laughed along, telling her he knew her too well, to know that the candles and roses was the only thing that would appeal to her in a date, not the expensive and often hard to pronounce food items or wine. She’d agreed and then when she’d leaned forward to lick a drop of melted chocolate ice cream from his thumb, the real fun had begun.

But you're so hypnotizing
You've got me laughing while I sing, you've got me smiling in my sleep
And I can see this unraveling
Your love is where I'm falling so please don't catch me

She smiled again, as she felt the exact moment that he came awake. His heart thundered under her palm, his arm tightened around her waist, even as she felt him against her belly, hard and hot. “Khush.” His whisper was half growl, half plea, it rumbled through his chest, causing a shiver to race down her spine, as his big warm hand followed. She nipped at his throat lightly, and a laugh escaped her as in the next moment, his fingers gripped her waist and she was flat on her back, his big sleek body hovering above hers. 

She gasped, as his tongue traced the shell of one ear, his teeth closing gently around the lobe, before he kissed and licked the sensitive spot just behind it. “Do you like that?” His whisper alone sent a sizzling electric current through her blood. She turned her head, her nose tracing the edge of his jaw as she whispered his name. Her hands gripped his shoulders as his hands skimmed her body. Each fingertip kissing her skin, the light touch feeling as intimate as if he’d entered her. Her blood rose to bubble, boil just beneath her skin, her nerves zinged, and still he worshipped her.  his lips and teeth working lazily, drawing frenzied gasps and whimpers from her.

“Beautiful Khush,” he whispered, his breath kissing her cheek, his thumb tracing her collarbone, “So Beautiful.” Her eyes opened and met his, and she remembered the boy who’d vowed to share his life with her, who’d taken her responsibility at the tender age of seventeen… just after the biggest tragedy had torn up his life in front of his eyes. She remembered the young man who’d protected her, respected her, and become her family in all ways that mattered. She remembered her Arnav who’d held her tight in his lap, as they sat in their dark chawl room, talking about their dreams. She remembered the Arnav who had dragged her back from the dead, literally, and still had had the strength to laugh and make her Maggi noodles as he nursed her back to health. She saw the man who’d given his life to her, and then made her his. She saw the man, her man, who had surprised her, and helped her relax- even when she hadn’t known that she’d been unbearably strained- stressed to the point of breaking, he’d seen- and like always he’d held her and made it all better.

His nose nudged hers gently, his lips brushing lightly against hers, “My Khushi.” He whispered against her lips, smiling as silvery moonlight lit up his golden brown eyes. And she realized that she’d been holding back. For her whole adult life, she’d been fighting her love for him, even as he held nothing back. And that was the moment that she gave up. She gave up the fight against her heart. He entered her, and her body became pure fluid beneath him. Her heart swelled inside her chest as his thumb caught a glittering tear that fell from her eye, his lips kissed it- drank it.  

That was the moment she let go, and then he moved inside her, and every nerve drew taught. “My Khush, My baby.” He murmured against her lips even as he sipped from her, and she was Falling. She arched against him and pulsed around him, and just as he gasped her name, giving her his all- she just wished that he would catch her.           

If this is love, please don't break me
I'm giving up so just catch me

NB: Catch Me by Demi Lovato

Yes, I love cheese burst pizza and Yes I love Tangled. ;) I also love your comments and reviews! So Go on! you know you want to! ;) 

Lonely September

He stood beside the French Windows nursing a cup of strong hot coffee that his secretary had brought in; with a reminder of the video conference he was supposed to be attending in another… he checked the dial on his wrist and sighed- half an hour. His eyes focused on the crashing waves of the sea just outside his office once again. The once soothing rhythm was now like a torture to him. 

His eyes closed, his sigh fogging the window in front of him. The almost silent pitter patter of the rain drops taking him down memory lane, as it was wont to do. September, he thought, looking around himself. His charcoal grey suit, black tie, polished Italian shoes, suave and sophisticated offices… He couldn’t have cared less about all of that. There had been a time, when he would be one of those people- itching to go out to the beach, enjoy the rain and the sea, live – really live- life... with her.

How was it, that even the thought of her tripped his heart up… still? He smiled, but she had always had that effect on him, hadn’t she? Right from the time he’d first seen her, she had captivated him, his angel. With those beautiful sparkling eyes, that mischievous smile, that tinkling giggle… He looked out again, the couple walking hand in hand on the beach in the rain plunging him back into bittersweet memories. Of Her.

“Come on NK, you’re being such a bore!” His brows quirked up at the pout he could clearly hear in her voice. Oh, now he was a bore? The following almost whined “Please?” managed to extract a sigh out of him, of defeat- and of course she heard that! How a smile could light up anyone’s voce was beyond him, but that was his angel as she laughed an exuberant “Thank you!”  through the phone. 

She had been waiting outside his building when he left work- and her excitement as always brought a smile to his face even as he teased her, “You do realize it’s raining, don’t you?” and had to suppress another smile as she rolled those expressive eyes at him. 

“Yes, Grandpa.” She huffed as he laughed, but then she was tugging him across the road towards the beach. Bemused, he had followed her- captivated by the swaying curtain of black silk that hung down her back, as she walked ahead of him. Her small soft hands wound around his arm as they reached their destination. Her contented sigh as she rested her head against his shoulder, prompting him to look down at her- her simple glowing beauty in that white button down shirt and blue jeans paired with a pair of blue and white peep toe sandals still managing to knock him on his ass somehow.

And they walked on the sand, their steps falling into an easy rhythm that matched the one of the pitter-pattering rain drops and that of the waves. “Have you tried Mumbai’s World Best Pakode here?” she asked him and he looked at her again in unhidden amusement, “Mumbai’s World best Pakode?” he asked, a brow quirking as he tried to stop his lips from twitching and she smacked his arm furthering his amusement. “That’s what the shop is called, smartass.” And as he laughed some more, she turned to him, that small pixie, her hands fisted at her hips- “Come on, macho guy, we’ll see who’s laughing at whom at the end of this.” And she had almost towed him to the small shop at the almost end of the beach that was indeed named Mumbai’s World Best Pakode. 

“Kaka, don plates. Ani ek Mirchi karal ha!”** She had instructed the bent old man behind the wok in rapid Marathi, smiling back at him mischievously. And then she’d brought back two plates of steaming pakode- and watched as he ate one, and almost blew fire it was that spicy. And then she had been the one laughing, bent double, tears of mirth streaming down her cheeks, even as he gulped down glass after glass of water to try and put out the fire on his tongue. And as their eyes had met- hers still sparkling with laughter- he’d known there was no going back. He’d realized that he would happily eat spicy pakode for the rest of his life if it meant she would keep laughing like that. 

And he knew that she knew it.

He was roused from his trip down memory lane, when his secretary came calling again. It was time to go back to the boring working Singhania. But something stopped him and as he looked back at the sea, he could have sworn he heard her sigh, “I’ll always love you, NK.”

Clearing his suddenly thick throat he called to his departing secretary. “Uhm, Mrs. D’souza, have you ever had Mumbai’s World Best Pakode?”

I'm sittin' here all by myself
just tryin' to think of something to do
Tryin' to think of something, anything
just to keep me from thinking of you
But you know it's not working out
'cause you're all that's on my mind
One thought of you is all it takes
to leave the rest of the world behind

Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did.

And as he sat back in his chair, enjoying spicy Pakode with his old secretary; he looked out at the waves too, sighing as he gave in to her- like he had always done, “I’ll always love you, Payal.”   

     

NB: Lonely September by Plain White T’s

**”Uncle, two plates. And make one Spicy okay?”   

Endless Love

Alrighty loves! Think of this as a comeback for G- and also SoG! So I was thinking, how about some alternate universes? Review Please!

Endless Love

The numbness that had engulfed her in its folds was slowly but steadily giving way. Funny how the calm that had helped her make the worst decision of her life, almost breaking her in the process, now fled her as the time to act on that decision came nearer. But had it been her decision? No. Her heart told her, it hadn’t been hers. It had been her Father’s expectant smile and gleeful shining eyes, her Mother’s gushing praise of the life she would have, the life she would enable them to have as she followed their wishes, like the dutiful daughter that she was, that had made it for her. 

It had only been two days before that she had made her way to her Father’s office. Hesitantly, she had asked of him, her voice trembling- Could she have some more time before she got married? She was afraid she was making a mistake… And then she had come to an abrupt halt as her eyes had found his. She shuddered as she remembered the cold hazel that had scrutinized her. He was confident he’d chosen the best way of life for her. Would she dare cross him? Would she dare insinuate that he had been wrong? No. She was to follow through on their decision. The Rathores always kept their word after all. 

Even if it meant ruining her damn life, she thought bitterly, as gentle hands coaxed her to descend the winding stairs that would lead her to the Mandap. Her hands scrunched up the beautiful Cream and Crimson Lehenga that had captivated her so- ten months ago.  Now, it felt like a prisoner’s uniform. An almost hysterical laugh bubbled up her throat as she descended one step at a time. A black and white striped uniform would have been more appropriate right now, she thought, they were leading her into her cell, after all. With Ceremony!

The gold and diamonds adorning her wrists and fingers suddenly felt heavy… like cuffs. Her hands shook as she curled them tighter into her lehenga. The gold and crystal beads sprinkled all over it tinkling ominously, even as her cousin murmured at her to stop ruining her jora. What would Jijaji think? She almost snorted at that. What would he think indeed? That brute would be glaring over at her right now, annoyed that his wife to be was not behaving exactly like the lamb he expected her to be. The lamb that was being led to its slaughter.

The ruby encrusted Maang-tika on her forehead slipped aside as her head suddenly came up. Delicate lines curving above her brow as she felt like she had just been plunged into ice cold water. Her eyes found those curiously shallow black eyes that she had come to detest over the past so many months. His lips were curled into an expectant smug smile, as he watched her walk slowly towards him. A slight frown passing over his good looking but cold face, before he hastily shut it down. Her lips parted in a silent gasp as her as yet numbed heart suddenly jumped to life. Her nose stung, as her eyes slid from his and searched the elegantly decorated hall for those Mocha and Gold ones that had become her refuge for the past ten months. The ones which had beseeched her to come away with them even as they watched her walk away. She had broken his heart, mercilessly, and now- now she realized her folly. Oh! What had she done?

And then she found him. Standing still as marble, face pale, the golden depth of his eyes hollowed with pain. She had done that to him. That realization stunned the breath out of her, and in no time her brute of a Husband-to-be was whispering her name harshly, bringing her attention back to her predicament. She watched, her pulse quickening rapidly as he raised the garland of flowers, ready to claim her as his and again her eyes searched those Mocha depths.  

Would you take me if I came to you, still? Would you still love me? 

His head tilted slightly to the side, and a small dimple appeared just below his left cheekbone. 

Yes, My love. 

And that was when she knew. No one else would ever do. 

And in a flurry of Cream and Red, her jewelry tinkling, her arms shaking, hair flying- Payal Rathore ran to him. Leaving behind her, a surprised and annoyed ex-Husband to be and a stunned family. NK opened his arms as she threw herself into them, burrowing into his chest- diamonds, rubies and all. Neither of them paying any attention to the spectacle they were creating in the hall. Eyes blurry with tears, she leaned up and touched her nose to his, a tender smile lighting up her face. And he smiled down at her, his eyes sparkling a burnished gold, shining with equal amounts of tears and happiness. 

“What made you change your mind?” He whispered as he swept her in his arms and walked away from their still stunned audience. She wound her arm around his neck, one hand lovingly cupping his beloved face as she honesty confessed-

“Because I suddenly realized… No one else would ever do.”

And NK Singhania laughed out loud, the sound mixed with her tinkling giggle- as they stepped into a new life together- armed with their Endless Love.    

And I,

I want to share

All my love with you,

No one else will do…

And your eyes, they tell me how much you care,

Oh yes, you will always be,

My Endless Love.

NB: Endless Love by Lionel Ritchie